What is good?

One of my favorite parables about a Chinese farmer…and a quick life/baby update! Pictures at bottom of post. Leave me a comment with an update from your life!

The Chinese Farmer

My mom is a counselor. My sister is a counselor. My husband is a year away from becoming a counselor. I'm lucky to be surrounded by so much empathy and perspective and deep listening. On my drive home every evening, I call my mom and process through the events of my day...my emotions...my stress. After listening, she often poses the rhetorical question, "What is good?" She is alluding to one of our favorite parables about the Chinese farmer. I return to this parable time and time again as I face hardships, like Asher's upcoming surgery (t-minus 20 days) or the water damage to our house just days before putting it on the market or the 1 hour 20 minute commute to work this past Tuesday. This morning, I read the parable again...and was so grounded by its message that I just had to share it with you all. What is good?

"Once upon a time there was a Chinese farmer whose horse ran away. That evening, all of his neighbors came around to commiserate. They said, “We are so sorry to hear your horse has run away. This is most unfortunate.” The farmer said, “Maybe.” The next day the horse came back bringing seven wild horses with it, and in the evening everybody came back and said, “Oh, isn’t that lucky. What a great turn of events. You now have eight horses!” The farmer again said, “Maybe.” The following day his son tried to break one of the horses, and while riding it, he was thrown and broke his leg. The neighbors then said, “Oh dear, that’s too bad,” and the farmer responded, “Maybe.” The next day the conscription officers came around to conscript people into the army, and they rejected his son because he had a broken leg. Again all the neighbors came around and said, “Isn’t that great!” Again, he said, “Maybe.”

The farmer steadfastly refrained from thinking of things in terms of gain or loss, advantage or disadvantage, because one never knows… In fact we never really know whether an event is fortune or misfortune, we only know our ever-changing reactions to ever-changing events."

Alan Watts reflects on this story: "The whole process of nature is an integrated process of immense complexity, and it’s really impossible to tell whether anything that happens in it is good or bad — because you never know what will be the consequence of the misfortune; or, you never know what will be the consequences of good fortune."

Now for a quick baby update!

Baby is 7 months old!
He is going to have bilateral hip surgery in about three weeks to correct his severe dislocated hips. His hip dysplasia was due several factors: I had hip dysplasia as a baby, he was breech for the last 15 weeks or the pregnancy, and he’s first born.
He’s the sweetest little peach in the whole wide world! Gentle, observant, stoic, loving, playful. He’s a lot like his dad.
He’s a chubby chicken. 80th percentile for height and weight. How’s that for a baby who was born 3 weeks early and developed in HALF A UTERUS?! Amazing!

Now for a quick life update!

We are in the process of selling our home to move closer to family.
Cory is just under a year away from finishing his (second) master’s degree in clinical mental health. He has an internship starting in August in adolescent addiction. Cory is an incredible human.
Cory and I are really into the new Brené Brown podcast called Unlocking Us. We recently listened to this episode about the Enneagram and have been obsessed with learning more about ourselves and each other the past week!
I’m currently listening to Glennon Doyle’s Untamed. I don’t think Glennon and I would be friends, but I certainly respect the way she’s living her life and agree with a lot of what she says in the book.
Life feels unreal sometimes amidst at the COVID-19 wonky-donkyness, amiright? I’m currently working with outpatients via telehealth only (3 hours a day with the same patient via Zoom! Isn’t that interesting/new/exciting?).
Just trying to stay grounded - this morning, the Chinese farmer parable helped me find my roots and that’s why I wanted to share it with you all!
Follow me on Instagram @embraceyourunicorn for more updates and pictures. I’d love to connect with you!
What’s new with you?